Make Decisions From Your Body, Not Brain
Posted by Eleanor Turner
We all face decisions every second - whether it’s big things like asking someone to marry you, or something as small as what you’re going to wear today (We hope it starts with one of our first layers!). It can sometimes be difficult to know what’s right for yourself. The biggest piece of advice I offer to friends, mentees, and anyone I encounter interested in this conversation is to remember: every SECOND is a choice. The key is learning how to slow down and tune into your body, which is always sending you signals about what feels right and what doesn’t. This is the foundation of conscious consumption.
You can Feel a Yes or a No in Your Body?
The answer is simple: yes, you can. 90% of the serotonin produced in the body comes from the gut. Serotonin is a neurotransmitter. So I encourage you to connect more with your gut and body than getting stuck in your head. The head does not leverage the fullest extent of your decision-making power.
The way you figure out how a ‘yes’ and a ‘no’ feels in your body is by doing a test. Sit in stillness and take a few deep breaths, letting any worry or distraction fall away. It helps if you're comfortable in what you're wearing (plug: think breathable pima cotton like our tees, tanks, and underwear). Think of one thing you LOVE doing and turn it into a yes/no question. For me, it’s “Do I love sitting in the sun with a homemade matcha latte in the morning?” That's a big yes. Once you have your question, feel into your body and observe any sensations. Repeat with a “no” question and do the same.
Typically, a “yes” feels like some kind of expansion — an opening up, lightness, or ease. On the other hand, a “no” often feels like contraction — a tightening, heaviness, anxiety or resistance. For me, it’s a little different. A “yes” is always felt on the left side of my body, and a “no” shows up on the right side, but it’s accompanied by an expansion or contraction. It’s important to learn how your body uniquely communicates with you. If you don’t feel anything, come back to this exercise when you’re feeling a bit more clear and try again.
Understanding the Power of Choice
It’s empowering to realize how many choices you actually have. No one can make you do something without your consent, and you always have the freedom to choose what’s best for you. Yes, there are scenarios where this isn’t the case, but I’m not talking about those here. I didn’t understand the concept at first. I thought I was a victim to circumstance at least a few times, but a recent teacher of mine gave me the work of Dr. Karpman about Escaping the Victim Triangle. The Victim Triangle explains how we can get stuck in roles of victim, persecutor, or rescuer in life’s circumstances, but by bringing awareness to our choices, we can step out of this pattern. It doesn’t discount the fact that some people have more privilege or access, but every single person is dealing with stuff - even the privileged ones. We all have stuff. Not being the victim to circumstance and bringing awareness to your options is incredibly empowering. So how do you know what’s right for you?
What Consumerism Doesn’t Want You To Know
It's perfectly natural to seek out things that make you happy or fulfill your needs — consuming consciously is part of living a balanced life. However, consumerism takes advantage of this by convincing you that more is always better. It defines success for everyone as more is more is more. Consumerism preys on our insecurities, convincing us that we need more to be enough, even when deep down we know that lasting fulfillment comes from within. It blurs the line between what you genuinely need and what it wants you to believe you need, driving you to overconsume. By constantly pushing new products and trends, consumerism feeds on the idea that you're never quite enough as you are and you don’t know what’s right for you - they do. Tuning into your body’s signals can help you make mindful choices instead of impulsive ones.
Learning to Trust the Process
Once you’ve practiced feeling into your body’s signals, the next step is to start trusting them. When making decisions, check in with yourself and listen for that expansion or contraction. Over time, you’ll find that your body has a deep wisdom that can guide you toward what’s right.
It can be tempting to second-guess or rely on external advice, but learning to trust your body is one of the most powerful tools you have and if there’s anything I’ve learned from this process, it’s that your body knows more about what’s right for you and the path you should take than your brain.
Let’s be clear, this is a practice. No one bats 1000 on it - we’re human. So far, in all of my searching, putting this into practice gets me closer to myself and my authentic path.
Why Are We Talking About This?
At The Big Favorite, we talk a lot about crafting a vision for your future. When you begin to tune into your body and make mindful choices, you’re not just resisting impulses — you’re also laying the groundwork for creating that vision for yourself. Getting a vision for your life requires clarity, and that clarity comes from within, not from external noise or trends. When you step back and listen to what truly feels right for you, you can better define your path. By aligning your choices with your inner signals, you begin to shape a vision that’s authentically yours, rather than one shaped by what you’re told you should want.
Final Thoughts: Your Body Knows Best
Our bodies are wise, and they’re constantly communicating with us. We just have to take the time to listen. That can be incredibly hard with the constant noise and distraction we face in the modern world. Learning how to feel what’s right for you starts with tuning in and trusting your own inner guidance. Remember, you always have the power of choice, and your body is here to help you make the right decisions. By practicing this daily, you not only make decisions that align with your true self, but also lay the foundation for a fulfilling, deeply authentic life. And that’s why The Big Favorite has started talking about this. Read on here.